You’ve probably done it already: scrolled through job portals, saved job postings, wondered if „part-time, 30 hours, hybrid“ is what you’re looking for. And you probably closed the browser window again afterward—without feeling like you’ve made any progress. That’s precisely the problem when you’re a mother trying to find your dream job: you’re looking in a place where it simply doesn’t exist.
Finding your dream job at 25 was much easier. Back then, it usually just came down to a few questions: What do I enjoy? What am I good at? Which company offers career opportunities, and what are the conditions? Becoming a mother adds so much more – your energy levels, your available time, and the question of how much of yourself you want to have left when the day is over. A job that was a perfect fit before parental leave can feel completely wrong now. Not because it’s become worse – but because you’re a different woman than you were then.
Why I didn’t look for my dream job, but created it
For a long time, I thought there was that one moment when everything clicks and you know exactly what job you want to do. That wasn’t the case for me. My journey from real estate agent to self-employed life coach wasn’t a single moment, but a long development – with many detours.
Ultimately, it was about getting to know myself better again after my parental leave. Discovering who I really am outside of housework and children. Not who I was before, but what kind of woman I am today. And in doing so, I realized that completely different things had become important to me – and above all, that time for myself had become much more precious than before I had children.
This clarity about myself was the real starting point. Not the job search. The three most important things: values, strengths, energy.
If you want to find your dream job as a mother, you no longer need to network or take an AI training course. You only need one thing to start with: clarity in these three areas.
1. Values: What is truly important to you in this phase of your life? Not what society or your family expects of you, but what feels right to you. Flexibility, purpose, financial security, closeness to family, personal development? Which values do you want to guide your life – both personally and professionally? Choose about five values that truly resonate with you.
2. Strengths: What are you really good at? What comes so easily to you that you take it for granted – while others admire it in you? And what have you gained through parental leave that you yourself would never describe as a qualification?
3. Energy: What activities energize you, and which drain you? What kind of environment is good for you, and which leaves you exhausted? Of course, there will never be a job where you only do things that inspire you. Nevertheless, it’s important to know the difference. And there’s something else to consider: What time of day are you full of energy – and when do you just stop working properly?
These three questions won’t replace a job search. But they will ensure that you know what you’re really looking for before you open the next job portal.
When you finally open it, it will feel different. Not because there will suddenly be better ads – but because for the first time you’ll know what you’re actually looking for.
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